Her tree is half-decorated, her presents half-wrapped, the floor is only half-finished, what does she do? She rearranges the family room. Why? Because she's crazy and she's my mother.
I love being home for Christmas. It's a winter wonderland. My brother is in his bedroom, puking because he overdosed on Vicodin. My other brother has decided that math is stupid and is dropping calculus so that he can take weight training. He also just got his permit and thinks that gives him license to drive us all crazy. My father is overeating out of stress because his only friend is dying. My sister is bitching about how her boyfriend is pissy because she's witholding sex from him. And my mother is rearranging furniture. Because the house isn't in enough of an uproar.
Stress, stress, beautiful stress. Oh, and my truck isn't insured so my plates are suspended until I provide the MVD with an SR-22. Not too sure what that is, but it sounds expensive, so I don't want to look into it. And I don't want to tell my parents, so right now I'm just pretending that I've lost my car keys. I'm screwed. And somebody's been opening my mail.
I'll be home for Christmas. You can count on me. Please have snow and mistletoe, and presents under the tree.